Thursday, December 23, 2010

Can We Start a Baseless Rumor?

Yahoo Sports has a column on Adrian Beltre that lists the Giants as one of the teams who might be a good fit. No actual evidence or speculation that he is heading to SF to replace Pablo, just the thought that the Giants might be a place he could land if the Angels continue to fail miserably at signing free-agents.

I started to write a post entitled: "Adrian Beltre to the Giants?"

You know how it would have gone:

"Yahoo Sports is reporting that the Giants are one of the teams who may or may not be interested in signing Adrian Beltre."

And then somebody googles "Adrian Beltre: Giants" and my post shows up. Given that somebody from Eastern Europe googled "Humoris Cainis" and my post on Matt Cain was the first thing that Google spit out, I don't think this is an unreasonable possibility.

(Yes, that really happened. No, I do not know what Humoris Cainis means. I'm afraid to google it while at work. I'm afraid it will somehow result in a video of Rex Ryan's wife's feet.)

So somebody else tells their friend that Adrian Beltre could go to the Giants. And they post it on their blog. And soon ESPN is reporting that the blogosphere has been "lighting up" with Beltre to the Giants rumors. Sabean reads the ESPN article and calls Scott Boras. Etc. etc.

Too much power. I don't want to be responsible for that kind of rumor.

No, if we're going to start a rumor here on our humble little blog (with readership in over 20 countries, though mostly that was just my sister's friend who likes to travel), it's going to be a good rumor.

So here goes. After I post this, you can help the cause by spreading the rumor to your friends by email, facebook, twitter, owl...and remember, you're not starting some horrible rumor that's going to result in the slandering of some poor public figure. You're helping to start a rumor that could help lead the Giants back to the World Series. Let's do it!

Ahem.

"Multiple sources may or may not have possibly confirmed that the Giants, Mets, and Phillies are close to completing a three-way deal that would send SS Jose Reyes to the Giants, OF Aaron Rowand and P Dan Runzler to the Phillies, and low-level prospects and cash to the Mets. The deal is a cost-cutting move that may or may not have been the brainchild of brilliant New York GM Sandy Alderson. The Phillies get bullpen and outfield help and the Giants cut salary while upgrading at SS. One source who may or may not be an employee of one of the teams called the deal 'a sure thing.' ESPN has not picked up the story yet, but rumor has it that the reason for the network's hesitancy is that senior baseball writer Peter Gammons is possibly or once could have been the contact for the possible source who may or may not be working in one of the organizations' front offices and that Gammons might currently be vacationing in the South of Boston and is unavailable as his grandchild may or may not have thrown his blackberry into the toilet."

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to text my sister to tell her friend that next time she gets to an internet cafe in Kiev, she needs to google Reyes-Gammons-Toilet.

3 comments:

  1. Let's give Beltre a shot at SS. He is far and away the best defensive third baseman in the game. Why couldn't he be an average Short Stop? Sure, he might give up a tit bit range, but with that arm and instincts, it would only be a minimal hindrance. At the very least, he's slightly better than '10 Uribe at the position. Not sure why this idea has never been mentioned (besides the Red Sox wanting him to replace Nomar there in '04 and instead settling for Renteria and a WS title), but it sure seems like a legit Sabeanistic rumor to me. And I still chuckle every time I think of him rupturing his testicle.

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  2. Oh, and googling that takes me to Terezowens.com

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  3. Yeah, but my source never mentioned anything about that. I'd call him, but he may or may not exist.

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